A Door Near Here by Heather Quarles

April 21, 2010

Dear Ms. Monaco,

Over spring break, I read a heartbreaking novel called A Door Near Here by Heather Quarles. This book is a realistic fiction story about a fifteen-year-old girl, Katherine, who has a fourteen-year-old brother, Douglas, a thirteen-year-old sister, Tracey, and an eight-year-old sister, Alisa. Katherine has been the one in charge in her house ever since their mom got fired from her job and is now an alcoholic who is asleep and locked in her bedroom literally all the time. She has left her kids to fend for themselves with no help from their oblivious father living on the other side of the country with a wife and a child. But, when their schoolteacher, Mr. Dodgson, starts to uncover the truth about the kids’ situation, he gets himself into a great deal of trouble simply from being a concerned and caring individual.

While reading this astounding book, as much as it pains me to say it, I understood almost every single decision and choice, both clever and hurtful, that was made by Katherine and her siblings. The kids only had two motives in this book, which are what determined every decision they made throughout it: not being separated from each other and surviving. Heather Quarles made this story so relatable for me and I’m sure for all of the other teenagers who read this book, and it really put my whole life into perspective. Whenever I am mad at my parents or when I’m having a crummy day, I think of this book and of the immense challenges that these kids about my age faced (I’m not just being corny, this is the truth). I could totally see myself in their situation because of the way the author made the characters think, feel, act, and react. On the inside of the back cover of this book, there were two short ABOUT THE AUTHOR paragraphs, one of them detailing about how Quarles “spent five summers working at a camp …with teenagers—some of whom were foster children, living with friends or in custody of Social Services. She often remembered those teenagers and their stories as she was writing A Door Near Here.” These two sentences were probably the most important two sentences in the 231 pages of this book because without Heather Quarles’s experiences with those unlucky teens born into bad situations, she wouldn’t have been so familiar with teenagers’ thoughts, emotions, actions, responses to stress, loneliness, and essentially, difficult situations. As a matter of fact, if Heather had not spent time with those deprived kids and experienced their unfortunate circumstances, this book would most likely not exist. I am so grateful that it does, because it was a life-changer, and Quarles surely made an impact on all those who have read and will read her book. It reminds one of how some people actually live day-to-day and how much we all try desperately to ignore it and to keep it an occurrence that takes place behind the curtain and under the mask: “Yes, I’ve noticed some strange behavior in this child suggesting that something is not right at home, but I don’t really know for sure because…well…what if it’s not true? It could get me into a lot of trouble, so I just won’t say anything or try to get involved.”Is that really how we want our country to react when another human being is in danger? No. The answer is no. None of us wants that to be the case, yet we do not want it to interfere with our lives and we do not want to be harmed in the process. If we are not willing to risk things for it, then why even bother wanting it? This is why I applaud Heather Quarles so much for creating this story because it raises awareness of the details of what’s really happening to children every day and it inspires us to bring out the *Mr. Dodgson* within all of us. (*Refer to paragraph one*)

“I stared at him, unbelieving. Then I turned around and kicked a chair as hard as I could. It flew across the kitchen and fell over on its side with a crash, making Douglas jump.
It’s too much. This is too much. That’s what I wanted to say. I wanted to scream it.” ( - Katherine)

The previous paragraphs reflect, basically, the whole book. The main problem in this story is that the world is on Katherine’s, Tracey’s, Douglas’s, and Alisa’s shoulders, and there are only a few others willing to help lift it off. This quote symbolizes how difficult it is to be thrust into someone else’s place in a split second, just because that other person’s choices weren’t so phenomenal. First off, there is scarcely enough money to last them the day. Then of course, you add to the mix that the food has almost entirely run out. Katherine, Tracey, Douglas, and Alisa additionally have no support and barely any contact with their father. After that, is of course, the person at fault for their lives being one terrifying and bitter mess: their own mother. They have to make sure their alcoholic mom, who they are absolutely petrified of, doesn’t fall over dead one day, and they worry about her constantly. The poor kids’ have also been abandoned and betrayed by their friends, to worsen the situation even more. In addition, they have to keep their guard up at all times so Mr. Dodgson won’t find out about their situation and separate them from one another. On top of all of that, Alisa is going completely crazy, believing that Narnia, the magical world in C.S. Lewis’s novels actually exists, and all they need to do is find the door to Narnia in the woods, step inside, ask the lion, Aslan, for help, and their mother’s “sickness” will disappear. How is that for pressure?! All of the time, people in general find their lives just too overwhelming or too terrifying to bear, so they intentionally overdose, they pull the trigger, or they hang themselves from their ceiling fan. Those, some say, are the easiest ways to escape pain. Think about this. What if you couldn’t? You had all of that misfortune to deal with and you couldn’t cease your life. There are people counting on you, people who would not be able to survive if you weren’t there to help them through it and be their guide and their leader in life. Well, that is exactly what Katherine, I’m sure, has considered many times; that by ending her miserable life, she would be ending any chance of success in her siblings’ lives. She can’t bring herself to be that selfish and leave them alone on this earth, which is exactly what her mother didn’t think through and weigh before starting her awful alcohol addiction. The mother of these pitiable children was essentially killing herself by taking that one thousandth sip of sherry, and she knew it, but she could care less about anyone else in her life besides herself. She is the reason, the cause for their unending struggle to survive. She “left” and Katherine took it upon herself to take control. Katherine did that for her siblings, for herself, and for her mother, and it is becoming way too much to bear. So, what do they do now?

This book was so relatable, and, as I stated earlier, I understood just about every task that the main characters completed and exactly how they felt. There was, however, one thing that stumped me throughout the whole book. I couldn’t understand why the three eldest siblings smoked so heavily in A Door Near Here. It seems as if they would look at their mother, collapsed on her bead with tons of shattered sherry bottles on her floor, and think, “Wow, I never, ever want to become an addict like her.” It is truly not the case with them, though. I would probably have a different opinion if I was actually stuck in their situation, with all of that responsibility and stress to deal with, but it just doesn’t add up. Yes, I understand that to be in a situation such as theirs, it would take strength, support, and comfort. Strength coming from within, support coming from one another, and comfort, evidently coming from the cigarettes, but why choose cigarettes? These kids are all young, talented people, so couldn’t they choose something more natural to be comforted by? I am sure that I am only saying these things because I am ignorant of how it would feel to be in an extremely difficult situation like Katherine, Douglas, Tracey, and Alisa’s, but it still puzzles me. They have seen what addiction has done to their mother, and even though they love her, they are aware of the disgusting beast that she has morphed into, so why would they ever want to even chance doing it to themselves? An aspect that might defend this strange behavior in Heather Quarles’s story is the fact that the copyright date is 1998, and smoking was a huge occurrence then, more common than it is today which means it was probably more acceptable too. That could explain some of the reason Quarles added this into her novel. Still, though, I do not understand why these children resorted to cigarettes in this book.

In conclusion, this was an astounding novel to read, and I truly did love this book. I usually am not a big fan of reading books more than once, but I hope to have enough time over the summer to reread it and experience the suspense, heartbreak, joy, and love all over again!

Sincerely,
Taylor M.— Period 1-2

P.S. – I absolutely recommend this book for anyone and everyone (twelve and above)! It taught me so much about the pure value of life and how much I take for granted every single day. Guy or girl, thirteen or forty, it does not matter. I think everyone could benefit from this book in one way or another. HIGHLY RECOMMENDED!!!!!!